Half Truths

Recently, a woman told me that she was thinking about deactivating her social media accounts because it’s just not authentic; people only display a perfect vision of their lives.

I stopped to wonder what it would look like if we showed our real lives on social media; the dark secrets and nitty gritty details of our lives. I’ve seen people post things about their marriage ending, about their kids, about their struggles with addiction. Yet, how do most people respond to these sorts of posts? A cringing “why would they share such personal stuff on the internet?!” All the while, everyone else is casting a perfect vision of what they want everyone to think their life looks like, when in reality it’s all simply just half truths.

Our culture is very unforgiving of anything that isn’t picture perfect. Mental health issues, family troubles, unemployment…these are things most of us just don’t share online. Why? Because in reality, we recognize that most people don’t really care about our dark days, and we definitely don’t want to give anyone an idea that our lives are anything but stellar.

So what’s the truth? Well, for starters, none of us have perfect lives although we each have perfect moments.

That “perfect” family you see sitting in that restaurant on Saturday? They probably got into a family argument the night before.

That “perfect” couple who seems over the moon? They are struggling to make sense of infertility.

That “perfect” home on instagram with an amazing kitchen, a wrap around porch, and spotless floors? That family is in debt and cannot pay the mortgage this month.

That “perfect” job that young woman seems to have? She wakes up with intense anxiety at night because she feels caged in her career.

Addiction, depression, anxiety, death and grieving, heartbreak, loneliness, unemployment, fear… these are things most of us avoid sharing with the world for many reasons, most of which are simply a form of self-protection.

The truth is: we each find ourselves drowning at certain times in our lives. We are in a cycle of life and death, and part of that merry-go-round involves a lot of struggle in the midst of a lot of joy.

I experience a lot of nostalgia when I look at older photos from certain times in my young adult life, images that I can clearly see hide a lot behind a forced smile.

Remember to reflect when you find yourself playing the comparison game, worrying about your own timelines and who has what. The truth is, we all have photos that simply don’t tell the whole story.

But this photo? This one is real, it’s unfiltered, and it’s full of a lot of love and joy.